Survival steps to help you get over your ex

Do you find yourself saying, "I'm not just over you." 

Do you find yourself saying, I'm not just over you.

Have you recently broken up with your partner? Do you find yourself unable to move on? Are you constantly thinking about the relationship that just ended?

Are you still into your ex?

Here are some simple ways to tell that you are still into your ex partner. Now take a moment to honestly answer the questions below:

  • I keep my ex’s text messages and emails.
  • I read over my ex’s recent emails and SMSs hoping to find answers for the break up.
  • I still send my ex text messages and emails.
  • I still read their Facebook, Twitter, etc posts and updates in the hope my ex mentions something about me or our relationship.
  • I hold onto hope that the relationship will continue when my ex partner has made it perfectly clear that it is 100% over.
  • I keep my ex’s number in my mobile phone just in case they call.
  • I sit by the phone waiting for my ex to call.
  • I visit the same restaurants and places I used to frequent with my ex partner hoping to run into them.
  • I call the friends my ex and I have in common probing for information about what the ex is up to now.
  • I purposefully go to parties where I know I will run into my ex.
  • I think about my ex most of the day.

If you answered “yes” to at least two of the above or you have done one of the above at least twice, there is a problem.

Here are some simple ways to tell that you are still into your ex partner. Now take a moment to honestly answer the questions below

If you are really serious about moving on and attracting and keeping your ideal partner, delete your ex’s text and email messages and phone number from your phone now. Stop dwelling on the past relationship, because to the extent that you still hold - you will block your energy from attracting the partner you want.

Your ex partner is your teacher

  • You have attracted your ex partner for a purpose - to help you to learn about yourself:
  • Did you do some things in the past relationship that caused you to compromise yourself?
  • Did you let your ex partner to treat you in ways that you wish you never had allowed?
  • Are you regretting how you reacted or behaved towards your ex partner?
  • Could you have done things differently to make the relationship succeed?
  • Did you attract your ex to help you realise that you are worthy of so much more in a relationship, and to stop settling for less or second best?
  • Has your fear of being alone, hurt, rejected or abandoned attracted exactly that?
  • Did your insecurities and emotional dramas push your partner away?

What can you learn about yourself from this past relationship?

Make room for the new

Before you can attract your new relationship, you first need to let go of all the past relationships by decluttering your mind from previous insecurities and negative behaviours. These old patterns will distract or confuse your thinking in your future relationship. By learning from past flaws you can now avoid repeating the same unsuccessful lessons in your next relationship.

Learn what you need to learn from your ex partner, let go of what has happened in the past, delete those messages and make room for the relationship you desire!


Dr. Vesna Grubacevic is an author, speaker, media commentator, the founder and Performance Transformation Expert® with award-winning company, Qt. She is the creator of breakthrough behavioural change techniques, holds a PhD, a BEc and has over 35 years’ business experience. She is passionate about helping people to improve their relationships and confidence. Her Amazon best-selling book, Stop Sabotaging Your Confidence, has also been gifted to Hollywood and Australian award winners, nominees, hosts and celebrities. For more free resources on improving your relationships, please visit

Ó Qt, 2000 – 2016. All Rights Reserved.