Dating

Relationship green flags that prove they're a keeper

#lovegoals

lovegoals

When you first start dating someone, it's pretty hard to resist the urge to switch on your 'red flag radar' and search for behaviours and character traits you just won't tolerate.

Obviously this is important - but so are the 'green flags'. When you're so busy focusing on what's not quite right (your date is a mad footy fan and you haaaaate sport) the subtle yet very positive signs can easily slip by unnoticed - and often, they're the ones that really matter.

Here are a few green flags to look out for.


They have a good relationship with their mum and sister

If you want to know how a guy will treat you in a relationship, play close attention to the way he treats his mum.

They don't try and change you

Your partner should love you exactly the way you are.

They send thoughtful texts

It may not seem like much, but sometimes a cute "Good morning" or "Thinking of you" message can go a really long way.

... and do thoughtful things, just because

It doesn't need to be an overly grand gesture like a bouquet of flowers either (although I'll never turn that down!). A few weeks ago I ordered my boyfriend a dessert off UberEats and sent it to his apartment when I knew he'd had a bad day at work.

They'll go out of their way to cheer you up

It could be giving you a massage after a stressful day at work or cooking your favourite meal. Whatever it is, it's a good sign.

They share your biggest values

There's nothing more attractive than a guy who's a feminist, supports gay marriage and whatever other values that are important to you.

You have similar lifestyles

If you're an active chick who loves eating healthy and working out and your partner is a couch potato who eats nothing but fast food? Yeah, that's probably not going to work in the long run. If you two share similar lifestyles, then that's a massive green flag.

They know your dreams and goals

And consider them just as important as their own.

They're kind to people in the service industry

Do you really want to spend your time with someone who's inexplicably rude to the teenager packing your groceries (and probably doing so for minimum wage)? Yeah, didn't think so.

They're committed to helping you become a better person and vice versa

Good couples should push each other to become the best versions of themselves. If your partner is open to bettering themselves and pushing you to become the best person you can be, then they're a keeper.

They're independent and have their own life

We're all guilty of being needy and a little clingy from time to time, but if your partner is constantly seeking your attention and needs to be with you ALL. THE. TIME that isn't a healthy relationship. If your partner has their own life/identity and can understand that just as they need some alone time, their partner does too, you're onto a winner.

They always make you a priority

Your partner should always put you and your needs above anyone else's and you should feel that you can always rely on them to be there for you when you need them.


emmaduffy01

Emma is just your average book loving, tea drinking, story writing, narcissistic millennial on an eternal quest for the perfect t-shirt. Ever since she picked up her first copy of Dolly when she was twelve, she always knew she wanted to work in magazines. She would describe herself as a bit of a hopeless romantic with an obsession for true crime and horror and a love for red wine, whiskey or a stiff gin and tonic. When she's not binge watching Netflix or buying things she can't afford online, she spends her weekends trawling through bookstores and eating her way through Brisbane.

 

7 Things he should never say on the first date

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These are major first date red flags.

These are major first date red flags

Did you know that when a guy talks a lot on a first date, it means he likes you? Yes, when a guy yaps away without giving you room to speak, he’s actually trying to impress you. It’s his way of ‘peacocking’.

Should the date not be a total disaster, we may give him the benefit of the doubt and wait until date 2 or 3 to see if he was nervously over-talking or if he is just self-absorbed.

But in the meantime, while he’s deep in solo conversation, take the opportunity to listen. He may slip up on a few topics with his over-sharing. Should he cover near to all 7 of the below red flags of things he should never say on a first date – run for the hills.

Female friends

“I have more female friends than male friends.”

This statement alone is the total turn off. When we’re dating a guy, the last thing we want to be worrying about is the large group of females he’s hanging out with on the regular. We’re also thinking about how many of them he’s welcomed into his bed. Even if it’s none, we’re thinking about it.

Career bragging

We’re all for a successful man, but someone that keeps talking and bragging about their career isn’t sexy. Bring in the money baby but do it humbly. We all have to work and your job isn’t ‘more’ important than ours.

Past drunken stories

This one is a major red flag of maturity. We’ve all met the one guy who can only talk about his reckless nights out. For him, his biggest accomplishment is how much he drank, how wasted he got, how wrecked he was the day after and all the crazy things he did that he can’t remember. Yeah, major turn off.

via GIPHY

Money

Why do men feel the need to talk about money on a first date? They might mention how much they’re earning, the outstanding debt left on their car repayments or weekly rent. On a first date, it’s nobody’s business to know the financial situation of either party. Discuss those details at another time, like date 5 or 10. If they think this topic will impress us, it won’t. It’s annoying more than anything.

Hookers or strip clubs

Talking and sharing the details about their last venture at the strip club or with a hooker is the least of your concern. It’s not exactly screaming boyfriend material and not something we want to hear or know. What he does as a single guy is his business, but right now he is here with you so he should be acting like a gentleman.

Exes

STOP. Exes and past relationships should be kept off the table. There is no need for him to open that door and spill out raw emotions or discuss how awful or wonderful she was. Again, how is this going to make us feel?

Social media stalking

“According to your Instagram and Snapchat Story, you had a wild time last night.”

Creepy much? Social media stalking is a no, no. We’ve all been victim to online ‘research’ but inevitably, let’s keep it on the low. No need know that your date has been checking in on you the very minute you make an update. Simply put, it’s uncomfortable.