Dating

Are you dating the man-child or a mature man?

When it comes to dating, here’s how you know whether he is a mature man that will treat you right versus the man-child not worth your time.

Here are 21 things that set men aside from boys, so you know just what you’re getting yourself into.

There is nothing worse than realising that you are dating what they call, a ‘man-child’. In your mid- to late-twenties you presume that most men you date will be just that - a MAN, but nope, too many times we women get into relationships with males only to realise a few months in that he is immature and not worth your time (yes this applies even when he has hit his thirties).


Here are 21 things that set men aside from boys, so you know just what you’re getting yourself into.

The man child: He lives at home or he has moved back in and out of home numerous times.
The mature man: He is either a long time renter or owns his own house.

The man child: He is yet to decide exactly what he wants to do in life and is ‘testing’ things out (i.e. he can’t hold down a job).
The mature man: He has a stable job in which he has worked his way up by now.

The man child: He makes vague plans and doesn’t always follow through.
The mature man: He makes plans in advance and sticks to them.

The man child: He hits you up late at night to come over.
The mature man: He makes an effort to come and see you!

The man child: When dropping you home after a date he doesn’t bother to walk you to your door, or even park the car.
The mature man: He walks you to your door after a date... If you invite him in, great! If you don’t, he’s mature enough to deal with that.

The man child: He loves talking about, or talking to, other women when he can see that it affects you.
The mature man: He won’t try to purposefully make you jealous or hurt your feelings just to get a reaction out of you.

The man child: He’s threatened by the men in your life, yes even your family, and always tries to compete.
The mature man: Rather than being intimidated by these figures in your life, he makes an effort to get to know them and bond because he knows it’s important to you.

The man child: He’s impulsive to the point where it can be reckless.
The mature man: He’s spontaneous but considers the consequences.

The man child: His house is littered with overdue bills and fines he hasn’t bothered to pay. He is reckless with money.
The mature man: He has his sh*t together and pays bills when they’re due.

Signs you are dating a man child

The man child: He is obsessed with Xbox or PlayStation games.
The mature man: While he might still like playing these games, he knows the importance of balance.

The man child: He is out partying every weekend and gets totally wrecked when he drinks.
The mature man: He knows how to party and have a good time but not every weekend! The mature man stays composed and knows how to handle his drinks and when to draw the line.

The man child: He likes overthrowing you and showing off how much stronger he is than you... it’s all about the power play with the man-child.
The mature man: He is strong but doesn’t feel the need to show it.

The man child: He criticises you if you haven’t shaved your legs or fake tanned in a while.
The mature man: The mature man can handle it if you aren’t “on fleek” 24/7. While he appreciates it when you make an effort, he gets that sometimes you literally CBF, just like you sort of love his overgrown stubble.

The man child: He often makes you feel inferior in conversations and treats you like your opinion is not valid.
The mature man: He might not agree with your opinion but he always listens.

The man child: Whenever he talks about his ex he always refers to her in a nasty way.
The mature man: He doesn’t dwell on the past and can accept that things happen for a reason.

The man child: He avoids uncomfortable conversations and only ever talks about random surface level topics.
The mature man: Obviously no man loves talking about his feelings. But the mature man is willing to discuss the harder issues with you when you bring it up and he knows how to connect with you on a deeper level.

The man child: He relies on other people to make all his big decisions.
The mature man: He values the opinions of others but he has the self-confidence to make his own choices.

The man child: He expects you to be his mother and do all the chores.
The mature man: He understands that relationships mean sharing the workload of cooking and cleaning.

The man child: He expects you to make all the plans when it comes to dating or else it’s just not happening.
The mature man: He plans dates and dinners, he even chooses a place to eat without nagging you about what you want.

The man child: He never takes blame for anything.
The mature man: Although it might get him down, he can accept responsibility for his actions.

The man child: He doesn’t take care of you when you need him the most.
The mature man: He isn’t put off by you being sick, or having your period or just generally feeling emotional, he is there for you when you need him.

[RELATED: New breed of men: how to spot the 'fice' guy]


Words: Frances van Eeden