So, you’ve always been the type to scoff at your girlfriends who use dating apps in search for love. You’ve always felt more comfortable meeting potential love interests IRL, and with your hectic work schedule, romance really isn’t on the cards. Yet TBH, the truth is Tinder has always freaked you out. What if no one matches with you? What if you swipe right on a psychotic murderer? Worse, what if the conversation is boring?!
Yet, somehow your best girlfriends have convinced you that Tinder is a good idea, that you’ve got this. And truthy you’d much prefer to get more involved in the less obvious definition of Netflix and Chill if you know what we mean...
And there you are. You’ve matched with a seemingly great guy who doesn’t appear to be a major f*boy, doesn’t send eggplant emoji’s and you talk almost every day. And then he texts the magic question; “lets get dinner”. You bite the bullet and agree ...and then the freak out ensues.
Here are the thoughts you have before you go on your first Tinder date.
1. OMG he wants to meet up.
2. Do I say yes?
3. Do I say no?
4. I feel like saying no but I also really want to say yes?
5. I have so many mixed emotions!!!
6. OK I SAID YES.
7. Ok, calm down. It’s not like he’s asked you to marry him or anything...
8. He’s replied “k”.... WHAT DOES THAT MEAN?
9. Ok now he’s saying he’ll pick me up on Friday at 7.
10. But tomorrow’s Friday!
11. Is it too late to say no?
13. What will I wear?
14. What if the conversation is boring?
15. What if he doesn’t think I look like my profile?!
16. What if he doesn’t look like his profile??
17. What if I’m being catfished!!
18. WHAT IF HE’S A MURDERER!
19. Ok...calm down... we’ll be meeting in a public space.
20. I can’t believe I’m going on a Tinder date.
21. What do you even do on a Tinder date?
22. What if he wants to get... intimate?
23. What if I’ve forgotten how to do it?!
24. Ok, I need to remove all of my body hair ASAP.
25. OMG no one can know about this!!
26. But will we go back to mine or will he want to go back to his?
27. What if we go back to mine and he’s actually crazy and he decides to stalk me?
28. Ok... if he knew how I’m thinking he’d definitely think I’m the crazy one.
29. Breathe... if things don’t go well I’ll never have to see him again.
30. But what if he’s a stalker?!
31. Alright, you’ve got this.
32. I can’t believe I’m going on a Tinder date.
33. I’m going to need at least 2 glasses bottles of wine to get me through this.
34. I’m actually kind of excited.
35. But what will I wear?!
Words: Frances van Eeden